A Poem About Joachim Murat, the Dandy King

I am the King of Naples, the brother-in-law of an Emperor, a marshal of France. I love my wife dearly and have many mistresses, but what I really love is fashion.

My favourite colour is white, so pure and bright! All my clothes are made from this fine material, with gold embroidery and ribbons to set off my magnificent form. I ride a beautiful horse in the same colours of white and gold, and she has hooves dipped in silver! My hat is high, my swords are shiny and my bicorne boasts a golden eagle.

I am Joachim Murat! And you know what? Napoleon does not like me. I have too much swagger, I have taken the crown of Naples for myself, and I refuse to obey his orders in Italy. But it is all worth it, because I look fabulous doing it.